Q&A - Attendants

Attendants

Q: Would a divorced woman still be considered a matron of honor or a maid of honor?

A: Traditionally, the matron of honor is a married woman and the maid of honor is a single woman. So, a divorced woman is really “single” and should be a maid of honor. (Also, it’s ok to have two maids on honor, by the way.) In some cases a bride will choose to have a maid and matron. Generally the maid of honor’s role take precedence, but some brides divide the duties equally. Either is fine, as long as it’s clear who does what.

Q: I have a matron and a maid of honor. Should my fiancé have two best men or a best man and an “honor attendant”?

A: Even though you will have a matron of honor and a maid of honor it’s not necessary for your fiancé to have two best men or or a best man and an honor attendant. Just one best man is fine. During the recessional, you can have the best man escort both your attendants down the aisle, with one on either side of him.

Q: My fiance’s “best man” is his closest childhood friend – a woman. We’d like to know what she should wear at the wedding and any idea’s for the wedding party’s walk down the aisle and position at the altar.

A: With many couples opting to have a woman as the best man and a guy as the maid of honor, questions naturally arise as to the proper wedding attire and procedures. When it comes to clothing, the good news is that there are several options to choose from. Your fiance’s friend can wear the same style dress as the bridesmaids, but in a different color to distinguish her role as the groom’s honor attendant. Instead of carrying a bouquet, and in lieu of wearing a boutonniere, consider giving her a wrist corsage. Another option: If the groomsmen wear black or tan tuxs or suits, have her wear a black or tan dress.

We had another wedding this past summer where the bride and groom had a mix of males and females. It did work out with the numbers to create equal pairs for both sides. The ladies all wore “bridesmaids” dresses and the guys all wore tuxes. We have another couple who will have 6 bridesmaid and 3 groomsmen, so they will “double” up on the exit. Really you can work anything out – have the people you want stand up with you no matter what their gender is!!